I Assumed One of My Close Relationships Was With a Narcissist — Here’s How Circles Group Therapy Helped Me Learn I Wasn’t Alone

Unlike some mental health services that advertise being able to treat a wide range of mental health issues, Circles takes a more targeted approach, specializing in divorce, breakups, and narcissistic abuse recovery in a group therapy setting. In fact, after clicking the “Start feeling better” button, the second page you encounter on the Circles website asks “What brings you here?” and offers you only these two options (“Narcissistic relationship” and “Divorce or separation”) plus a “Something else” option that basically tells you that Circles is only “focusing on relationship changes for now” along with the email address for their support team.

While this may be the endpoint for some people seeking another kind of mental health treatment, if you’re looking for treatment in one of their two main areas, this could potentially be a good match.

I found that the online registration process for Circles was actually very easy. First, I chose between which type of support I was looking for — in my case, it was narcissistic abuse. Next, I clicked through a series of pages advertising the benefits, format, and goals of using the service. I was then asked for my email address along with a series of questions pertaining to my mental health and how well I might benefit from a group therapy type scenario. I did notice that these intake questions felt very general, vague, and not really focused on my mental health specifically.

Once I had answered the required questions, I was asked to choose my subscription plan. Either the monthly plan at $29 per month, the six-month plan at $129, or the annual plan at $179. While I knew I could save some money per month on a longer plan — the six-month breaking down to $21.50 per month, and the annual breaking down to $14.90 per month — I chose the monthly option to make sure I liked the service and could benefit from it before paying upfront for a longer commitment.

I’d like to point out that this part of the registration process did seem a little misleading when it came time to claim my one-week free trial. If you click on the “Start 7-day free trial” button from the pricing page, you may not have noticed that you were selecting the Annual option, since the purple highlight matched the “Best Value” callout over the annual option — making it look like a webpage design choice and not the method for actually selecting your plan.

On the next page, you can enter your contact information and credit card information on the checkout screen. However, if you didn’t know to select your subscription plan from the previous page, you will see the discounted $14.90 per month figure, the $179 grand total, and “Start your free trial” written on the final confirmation button. Had I not been paying close attention and noticed the $14.90 amount was less than the $29 I had been expecting, I might have accidentally clicked the free trial button and committed to the yearly plan.

It’s also worth noting that the risk-free trial is available with any membership option you select.

Once I signed up and had selected my membership plan, I was ready to use all the tools that Circles offers to its members. I was given the option to download the Circles app for my phone, or I could use the online portal. Since my schedule can be pretty hectic and I don’t have a lot of time at home to regularly be in front of the computer, so I decided to download the app on my phone. After realizing that I should be searching for “Circles” — even though the online webpage address is CirclesUp — I found the app was otherwise easy to download, log in, and navigate. My username and password had already been created with my membership, and there had also been a phone verification step while signing up that helped ensure it was indeed me using the app.

To their credit, the first support room that I could join was starting approximately five minutes after I got set up with the app. I appreciated that I didn’t have to wait to actually get started, since so many services today include a few days of waiting to get started while everything gets set up.

I didn’t really know what to expect, so when I entered the room, I just sat and listened. This particular support room was about recognizing manipulative behavior in relationships. I really appreciated that the therapist leading the session wasn’t reading from a notebook or pulling talking points from a slide deck — she was talking to us like she was a friend. She was mixing in experiences she had witnessed and shared some very good insight. There were also times when I could have spoken up if I had wanted, and many others did feel comfortable enough to share in the discussion.

I’d like to quickly point out that when I tried Circles, the app had used live video in the session, but they have since switched over to exclusively audio-based meetings.

After this first experience, I roamed the app and looked to see what other online therapy options were available. There were other sessions available throughout the rest of the day, and more scheduled throughout the week. The times of the days varied, and you could see the topic and who would be leading each room ahead of time, so you could easily build a schedule for yourself for the week if needed.

I wanted to get a really good sense of what each session had to offer its attendants, so I did take advantage of all the rooms I could at first and joined over 10 in just a few days. There is so much information to take in, especially as you’re getting started, so most of the time, all I did was listen. In fact, one session I joined was so packed with helpful info that I joined more than once, just so I could take notes the second time around. This is also where the group therapy structure helped, as another Circles member gave me a few skills to practice on my own, independent of the content that the group leader was sharing.

In addition to larger online group therapy sessions, Circles offers other group-oriented services to its users, which is especially useful if the idea of large group therapy meetings doesn’t appeal to you.

Joining Smaller Group Sessions

When I choose this option, I could choose a session with one of three facilitators. Each of the facilitators had a bio that I could read and learn more about their background and training. These sessions include fewer than 10 members, and you can talk more openly about what your goals are and how you want to accomplish them.

I joined one of these sessions during my first week of using the app. I started off by introducing myself and spoke for a bit about one of my narcissistic relationships that had been on my mind. One of the best things about this group setting over talking one-on-one with a therapist was that I quickly learned I was not alone! In fact, there were others in the group who had the same type of relationship, and I found real comfort in knowing that this was a very common type of relationship.

Now, I know that for some people, the idea of sharing this openly with strangers may seem intimidating, which is why I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone who thinks this type of therapy isn’t for them. But as for me, I can say that I got a lot more out of my peer interactions in this session than I initially thought I would. The therapist also helped encourage this type of peer communication and really didn’t offer any type of guidance that broke the flow of the conversation. I’m not sure if this is the normal way for all of these sessions to go, though, because I was not able to attend additional sessions with this smaller group due to scheduling conflicts.

Chat and Text-Based Therapy

One of the features that was new when I joined Circles was their customized chat option. This text-based method allows users a texting alternative to live video group therapy. While I was able to benefit from both the larger and more private group video sessions, this was another option that I found valuable. There are several different text-based groups, and they are organized and presented to you just like a normal series of group text chains that you would have on your phone, but this time through the Circles app. There was a good discussion going on in the chat space that I used, and while I’m sure it is monitored by multiple therapists (in case the conversation veered in a direction that would require intervention), in all my time chatting, I didn’t see a therapist comment. This helped the conversation feel more natural and is a strong testament to the quality and seriousness of the other participants.

If you are having a bad day, want to offer support to another user, or just had a thought come to mind about your narcissistic relationships, you can just text it out. There were multiple times that I would comment on what someone else had said to try and offer support or discuss a skill that I had applied that day, and what the result was. This created a real sense of family and security for me, and I saw it as a safe place where I felt that I could speak up — the complete opposite of my live video sessions, where I didn’t really talk that much.

Since Circles is structured in a way that you can attend meetings as they fit into your schedule, and unless you’re a part of the weekly, more private group meetings, you can easily use the service as much or as little as you want to utilize it. Unlike recurring weekly one-on-one therapy sessions that might charge a fee for rescheduling too close to your appointment time, there’s no need to reschedule a session if you can’t make it that day; just look to see the next time it is being offered.

As far as I could tell, there doesn’t seem to be a formal way to pause the service, but being on the monthly plan, I could easily cancel my subscription and join again down the line if I wanted to start attending meetings again. Of course, this could present a problem for anyone who had purchased the 6-month or 12-month subscription in advance, so if you’re on the fence about starting Circles, it might be better to start out monthly (and enjoy your one-week free trial) and upgrade to the multimonth subscriptions if you feel that you are really benefiting from Circles.

7 Cups

Group therapy sessions are at the core of what Circles has to offer its paid subscribers, but if the cost of their subscription is outside of your budget, 7 Cups may be a more budget-friendly option. 7 Cups offers a free 24/7 chat service that connects you with a trained volunteer to talk through how you are feeling and offer emotional support. In addition, 7 Cups manages an online community support forum (similar to a group therapy chat room) for free. This forum allows participants to create their own posts around a variety of topics, and other users can comment, like, and engage with the posts. 7 Cups does offer a paid service that pairs you one-on-one with a credentialed therapist with unlimited text messaging for $159 per month. Phone and video sessions with your therapist are also available for an additional fee.

It is worth noting that our tester’s trial of 7 Cups was not positive, and as a result, we do not recommend the platform. However, since it is one of the more well-known online therapy services, we wanted to discuss how it compares with Circles to help present more of the online group therapy services that are available to you and help you make a more informed decision.

Grouport

Where Circles limits its scope to narcissistic relationships, divorce, and breakups, Grouport offers a wider range of group therapy treatments beyond relationship issues to include mental health conditions like depression, anxiety, and obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). Group sessions are held once a week at a cost of $35 per week, which is billed monthly at $140. Additional groups and individual sessions can be added separately, and Grouport advertises discounts for bundling multiple services. Something that Grouport doesn’t offer (as of this publishing) is text-based services or unlimited messaging, which is offered through Circles.

Monument

While the most limited in scope of online group therapy, for those looking to reduce their alcohol intake or quit drinking entirely, Monument offers one-on-one therapy, medication to reduce or quit drinking, online resources, and access to online group therapy. Monument allows access to a 24/7 community forum as well as moderated support groups, as well as one-on-one therapy and medication-assisted treatments.

Growing Self 

If the primary appeal of Circles for you was the group therapy element, then Growing Self likely isn’t for you. But if you’re looking for therapy or coaching focused on romantic relationships, couples, and marriage, then this service may be worth a look. These specialized sessions mean that you are more likely to find a therapist or coach who can directly address your needs, like premarital counseling, heartbreak recovery, and couples coaching, to name a few. The rates at Growing Self for one-on-one sessions can vary, and according to their website, can change based on your therapist’s or coach’s level of expertise. They list between $75 to $170 per 45-minute session as a general range. Growing Self does say that your insurance may cover the cost for certain types of therapy, but in general, it seems like insurance coverage may be limited or unlikely for users.

I didn’t have very high expectations for this type of therapy, assuming that I’d just get lost in the crowd or quietly listen while other people shared their stories, especially because it wasn’t going to be truly individualized. I was very wrong. With all of the options and different types of sessions available for Circles users, I have to say that I got a lot more out of this platform than I originally anticipated.

Since there are multiple types of communication and group settings within this platform, it is the kind of app that gives you back what you put into it. So for anyone thinking that they don’t have the time to really commit to Circles or maybe have a history of signing up for a new service and dropping out after a week or two, this may not be the best option because you aren’t incentivized to return to the app and attended sessions — it is up to you to put in the time.

This is a great option for those seeking support but who may not be at the point where they need (or want) to have the spotlight just on them for a specialized, one-on-one therapy session. I found that, for me, one of the biggest benefits of group therapy was being validated, and seeing how other people were managing their similar relationships was encouraging and told me that I wasn’t alone. If you think that group therapy would help you better navigate a narcissistic or difficult relationship, Circles provides you with some of the tools to succeed and a welcoming community to help you along the way.

Online therapy is continuing to grow in usership and popularity, and with so many different services available just a few clicks away, we recognize how difficult it can be to know if a service is right for you. To help you make a more informed decision, Everyday Health is testing and investigating over 65 different online therapy companies to find out what each one has to offer its users.

Not only are we directly signing up and testing these services ourselves, but we are also vetting each company’s history and business practices, surveying other active and former users, and talking to experts and licensed therapists to get their input on how effective each service is at actually delivering what’s been advertised.

During our hands-on trials, we’ve documented the sign-up, account creation, and payment process, as well as any pros or cons we encountered along the way. We’ve looked into the qualifications of the therapists on the platform and shared our honest feedback about how our sessions would go and noted any positive or negative experiences. It is our hope that by presenting all of our findings to you, you will better know what to expect from each company, long before you sign up and commit to a new service.